Sometimes it can be difficult to determine how healthy a relationship is, or to know what is "normal." Below is a quick quiz to see if there are any "red flags" or concerning behaviors in your relationship.
Ask yourself these questions:
Does your partner...
Try to keep you away from the people you care about most or from friends you have from before you began dating?
Embarrass you or make fun of you in front of other people?
Make you feel afraid, or use threats to make you do what he/she wants?
Make you feel there is "no way out" of the relationship?
Make you perform sexual acts that you don't enjoy or touch you against your will?
Threaten you with force, words, or weapons?
Use alcohol or drugs as an excuse for saying hurtful things or abusing you?
Get really angry a lot, and you don't know why - but you feel like you are "walking on eggshells" all the time?
Not believe he/she has hurt you, or blame you for what he/she has done?
Physically force you or hurt you to make you do what you don't want to do?
Threaten to hurt himself/herself, you, a pet, or people you love if you break up with him/her?
Tell you that you are stupid, ugly, or unwanted, or put you down in other ways?
Tell you that if only you did things differently or better, that he/she wouldn't have to hurt you?
If you answered yes to one or more of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship; for more information about what you can do to be safe, visit How to Help Yourself. Also, the Violence Awareness and Response Coordinator (VARC) at the Boise State Women's Center can speak with you and help you to determine how to keep safe and what resources are available.
